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Doona Days - Depression

(extract from book 'Doona Days')

by Kirsty Kelly

Ever woke up and wished you hadn't? Wished you could just be swallowed up by the bed and disappear?  It doesn't matter how long you lie there... the sun continues to rise and fall and the world outside the doona continues on. No one tells you it's going to be like this. Doona Days were the seconds that turned into minutes, then hours ... The days when the doona wasn't going anywhere and neither was I. The irrational thoughts and fears all submerged below a layer of cotton and eider down! Staggering in a dopey daze from the doona to the toilet—only because if I didn't my bladder would surely burst. Occasionally seeing sunlight peaking in from behind the venetians. If I dared to step into another room and look outside and see a person or car go by, knowing that the world was continuing on without me. It is hard when I experience Doona Days. I don't want to talk to, or see anyone. Exactly the opposite of what would be good for me. I just hope that with the work I am doing with my shrink, and the right medication, I can get back on track – wherever that may be. At the moment I'm just working on decreasing the number of Doona Days. Something strange happens to a person when the doona takes control. People start to ask where's the chick that used to run, paddle, sing, dance, socialise and hold a job down.

Strangely enough when I look in the mirror I see the body I used to live in, slightly emaciated with panda eyes and bad hair. It is as if aliens have visited and replaced me with a shadow of my former self. If it's hard for family and friends to accept the changes in this once 'the life of the party', 'out there', 'bubbly,happy girl,' imagine how I feel. 

When faced with a mirror, usually on 'excursions' to the shower (during Doona Days I was lucky if I fought my way out more than a few times a week), add a little make-up and clothes, I was actually able to appear as a 'sane'/'stable' human being. Upon careful observation you may notice one little feather attached, and no that feather is not the latest fashion accessory in hair garnish! I may think that Iam out fooling everyone and on the road to success, but alas the doona still has plans I can't yet escape.

Baby steps are required when planning your escape from the doona. Be prepared for experiencing moments of frustration. Once I started to see some light I wanted to run straight towards it and to have everything return to normal ASAP! The doona is not so forgiving. 

Simple things start the recovery process such as getting up at roughly the same time each morning,exercising, even if it you can only manage a 15–30 minute walk per day. As the days pass, the time will increase and so your mood will improve! Employing the thought police was another necessary step for me to escape the doona. It is strange to think that I am my own worst enemy. As well as a chemical imbalance, allowing negative thoughts and worries to build up lead to feeling down. I thought that the depression led to the negative thoughts—go figure!??

Recovery like anything takes time; good and bad days. Friends and family beware! You may want to prepare yourself for the recovery phase. It is a time in which I know that I have felt so good to be over the Doona Days that I was 'up bright and early, energetic and looking for someone to play with. Run, talk, brekki, whatever...' so don't worry when the doona and aliens return your friend, just be prepared!

Although there were times when I saw no light, I trusted in the people who loved and supported me. They also allowed me to learn that it is ok to take time out for myself and to find the help I needed. After all what strength do a few ducks and a bit of cotton really have to keep you down?

 For enquires about the book 'Doona Days,' you can contact Kirsty at



Hello Lonely Heart

by Faith Ransom